By: Elena Jamscek
So…I just had a baby and this is my first week back to work. That first day was hard but it’s getting better! My first entry back at work I thought I would talk about something that kind of gets glazed over by your friends, family, and even your physicians when you’re an expectant mother; the baby blues and postpartum depression. During my pregnancy people always made me believe that after baby its butterflies and rainbows…well, it’s not! My OBgyn did let me know that I would have a surge of hormones after delivery for about 2 weeks and to call if they got too bad, but never once was I given a play by play of what actually happens. I’m not saying everyone is the same or has the same feelings but I think that it could have been explained a little bit better. So here is my experience…
About 3-4 days after delivery, that surge of hormones hit me like nobody’s business! Crying for no reason and getting extremely upset with my husband for little to no reason. I was ready to call it quits and move into my parent’s house with my baby. It was struggle city for me! On top of all of that I was attempting to breastfeed and we (my baby and I) were not enjoying it! I felt like a failure, like I didn’t know what I was doing, and alone because there really isn’t much a husband can do to help in this situation. No one tells you HOW MUCH your life changes after baby including your relationship with your significant other. My friends painted the picture of just pure love and joy after their babies and I was just thinking that something must be wrong with me because ‘my best friends and I tell each other everything and I never heard anything like what I am going through!’
Well, if you happen to be reading this and are going through something similar, you are not alone! Once I opened up to my friends about what was happening they said they had very similar feelings.
I think having these feelings make us feel like failures and we don’t want to talk about it; but we should! It is normal! Crying for no reason after baby is normal! Feeling alone and helpless after baby is normal!
HOWEVER; if these feelings ever turn towards feelings of harm towards baby CALL YOUR DOCTOR! If these feelings last longer than 2 weeks CALL YOUR DOCTOR! Even if you’re within the 2 weeks and it’s just too much to handle call your doctor, IT IS OK TO ASK FOR HELP!